Miss Manners: My charming and enjoyable brother is also openly racist, misogynistic and homophobic

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My brother is intelligent, educated, well-spoken and has a responsible job. He is also openly racist, misogynistic and homophobic — all for religious reasons, of course.
To his credit, he never brings these subjects up, but if they do come up, he’s not at all bashful about articulating his bigoted views. His response to criticism is that he’s just as entitled to his opinions as liberals are to theirs, and he’s just as entitled to express his opinions as liberals are to express theirs. He says that tolerance includes tolerance for all viewpoints, including his.
That does not sound quite right to me, but I can’t exactly put my finger on what’s wrong with it. He is otherwise a charming and enjoyable person to be around. At this point, the rest of the family just deals with it by avoiding these subjects.
What do you think we should do?
GENTLE READER: Keep avoiding those subjects.
Of course it is tempting to poke the bear, even though you know how the bear will react. Your brother is presumably a grown-up, entrenched in his prejudices, and arguing is less likely to reform him than to spoil family gatherings.
Miss Manners can, however, offer you some comfort.
First, you are already making your point effectively by refusing to engage with him when he speaks like that.
And second, you are right that hate speech does not deserve the same tolerance as the wide divergence of well-meant opinions.
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(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, [email protected]; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)